When director Farah Khan Kunder sat down for a chat with her close friend Sania Mirza on the podcast Served with SanyaShe revisited a painful chapter from her childhood. she She said her father, Kamran Khan, who was once a successful producer, “went through tough days and faced the bottle.” By the time of his death, the family had lost everything. Farah recalls that “we had to start working at the age of 15” and even the money needed for her father’s funeral was borrowed.
Speaking about the family’s struggle to survive, Farah said: “My mother used to let gamblers play; that’s how we bought groceries.” She described how these men “put Rs 5 each in the kitty for the basic survival of the family for the next day. This Rs 30-35 was used to buy milk for the next day, which was a small amount.” brother And a quarter or half of my father’s bottle. If for any reason they don’t come to play, there will be no milk for the next day. “If two more people came, we would get excited because we would get lamb today.”
She admitted that those years left a deep emotional imprint, an imprint that still remains. “It was literally. It’s a very frustrating place to come back from…I can.” The smell of alcohol Very good whenever you travel; It triggers a childhood memory for me. I used to stay at college till 6:30-7 so that I wouldn’t have to go home. Even now, I’m insecure about money. I understood why my father used alcohol (sic).”
But how does growing up with financial insecurity affect a child’s long-term relationship with money?
Sonal Kangarot, licensed rehabilitation counselor and psychotherapist, The Answer Room, tells indianexpress.com, “Growing up with financial insecurity, especially when combined with a parent’s addiction, profoundly impacts a child’s sense of money, self-worth, and emotional safety. Chronic financial stress during childhood has been linked to long-term anxiety, low self-esteem, and trust difficulties (Conger et al., 2010, Journal of Family Psychology). When addiction leads to instability, the home often feels Insecure, unpredictable, and emotionally barren – leaving the child to internalize the chaos as usual.
She adds that children in such environments often equate self-worth with financial security, leading to either excessive attachment to money or chronic guilt about spending. The absence of trust and stability replaces curiosity and confidence with helplessness and despair that can continue into adulthood.
How trauma is “stored” in the body and sensory memories
Khanjarot states that trauma is often “stored” in the body through sensory and emotional memory. When a person experiences traumatic events — such as witnessing addiction or instability — the brain associates those memories with the sights, sounds, or smells present at that time.
“So, triggers like the smell of alcohol can instantly put a person back into that unsafe state. The body reacts before the mind can rationalize, activating that same fear or stress. Healing involves creating safety in the present: grounding exercises, body-based therapies such as Physical experienceThe expert concludes that trauma-focused psychotherapy helps individuals separate the past from the now and regulate their emotional and physical responses.
(Tags for translation) Farah Khan
